February 5, 2012

Happiness is a Choice You Make

Choose HappinessIt’s true what they say about happiness being a choice. My mother always told me that you have to make your own happiness, that you can’t rely on anyone else to provide it for you. And she was right. Being happy is a choice we have to make for ourselves, no one else can do that for us. Just as your inner peace comes from a place deep within your heart, so too does your happiness and it’s completely up to you whether or not you let it out.

Like anything worth having, happiness takes work. It comes from the choices you make, the attitudes you have toward life and living. Happiness can be long-lasting or it can be fleeting… again, it’s your choice.

So, what choices should you be making in order to ensure long-lasting happiness?

1. Choose to have a positive attitude.

“A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty.” – Sir Winston Churchill

Looking for the good in everyone and everything around you is a sure way to help you feel happier. Think of the old “glass half full” scenario. Wouldn’t you feel happier thinking that your glass is half full rather than feeling sad that it is half empty?

It’s the same with your life. Choosing to see your life as filled with possibilities is going to leave you with a much happier feeling than looking at your life as half over and lamenting missed opportunities. That’s just depressing. When you look at it with a positive point of view, you will see that missed opportunities were missed for a reason… there’s something better just around the corner.

2. Choose to let the past go.

It’s very hard to be happy when you are filled with anger and resentment over something that happened in the past. I know a few people who have grown up to be very bitter because they can’t get past things that have happened in their childhood. As a result there is no room for happiness in their lives because they choose to hang on to the past instead of letting it go.

Once you choose to let the past go and forgive the people involved, you open the door to much more happiness for yourself.

3. Choose to accept that there are going to be things you just can’t change.

“I wanted to change the world. But I have found that the only thing one can be sure of changing is oneself.” – Aldous Huxley

How much of your happiness is wasted trying to change things or people that you have absolutely no control over? As humans, it’s in our nature to want to control everything around us. Whether it’s people or situations, the sooner you can accept that there are going to things you just can’t change, the more room you leave in your heart for happiness.

4. Choose to be grateful.

Gratitude and happiness go hand in hand. When you are grateful for all the good things in your life, you can’t help but feel happy to have them there. Choosing to be grateful for all the little blessings and miracles in your life opens you up to receiving and accepting even more blessings and miracles.

One of the best pieces of advice I’ve ever received is to keep a gratitude journal. Take five or ten minutes in the morning and again before you go to bed and write down everything you are grateful for. You might struggle at first, but the more often you consciously stop and think about the things in your life you have to be grateful for it will become so easy that you’ll have trouble stopping after five or even ten minutes of writing.

5.Choose to help others.

“You cannot always have happiness, but you can always give happiness. ” ~Author Unknown

When you choose to help others, you are also helping yourself at the same time even if you don’t realize it. It doesn’t even have to be anything big; sometimes all it takes is a smile or a kind word to someone who’s having a bad day that helps them get through it.

When you make choices such as these, to embrace the positive pieces of your life and be grateful for them, you open yourself up to more happiness and a more fulfilling life. You have made the choice to be happy!

Living Life Today, Not Someday

view from Omemee bike trailThere’s a saying out there that “yesterday is the past, tomorrow is the future, and today is a gift so that’s why they call it the present.”" I used to dismiss it every time I heard it because it sounded kind of cheesy to me, but the older I get the more I realize every day really is a gift. Focusing on the past doesn’t do anything for you because you can’t change what happened back then. And looking toward the future, while a nice idea is just that — an idea — unless you use the gift of today to do something that’s going to get you that life you want “someday.”

The question is … why can’t someday be today?

The truth is someday can be today if we let it. If we stop and think about it, today and all its moments are the building blocks of that future that we say we want. Learning to live in the moment and taking the actions we know we should be taking will start us on the road to living our best life in the now instead of somewhere down the road.

Take One Step Forward

I started reading Gretchen Rubin’s “The Happiness Project” awhile back. And although I haven’t finished it yet, one line right near the first when she is setting out her commandments for happiness really stuck in my mind.

“Do what ought to be done.”

How many times do we put off living and doing what we know we should be doing, in order to goof off and go in a totally different direction where we know darn well that it’s not going to give us the result we’re looking for.

That commandment was like a wake up call for me because I’m great at procrastinating at what ought to be done so that I can read a book, sit down and watch a race, or even just take a day off to wander around outside. Even though the writing, the marketing, and even the laundry doesn’t get done … in that moment it’s more important to me to procrastinate than to do what I know I should be doing. That’s definitely not living my best life.

Since I’ve borrowed Gretchen’s commandment for myself, and have been practicing doing what I know has to be done each day before I get to the book, the race, or the great outdoors I am living better, more things are getting done at the right moments, and I am living a much better life than I was when I was the queen of all procrastinators.

The funny thing is, that once you start taking action and doing those little things you know need to be done, you start seeing yourself as more successful, more deserving of, and able to live your best life. Whether it’s another article published, or just knowing that your favorite shirt is clean when you want to wear it … these are things that a successful person would have and since you now have them, it’s one more way you are living that successful life you want. Little things like this make you feel like you’re living a better life even though the big picture might not have changed much at all.

Grow Your Results

You can then multiply those feelings by using tools such as meditation and visualization to really get your present moment energy flowing. (You knew I was going to fit those in here somewhere didn’t you?)

Let’s start with visualization. When you’re basking in the glow of having done what needs to be done in the moment, see yourself as successful in the future because of the actions you have taken today. Really let yourself feel how successful you are, how your life has changed for the better, and how you are living the life of your dreams right at this minute.

And be proud of yourself for taking the step you know you had to take this day to get to where you ultimately want to be. Then harness the energy and the momentum you create and realize that in doing so you are living your life to the fullest in this moment.

Adding meditation into the mix allows you to slow down and really revel how you are feeling at that moment. That’s because meditation is all about being in the moment and not having to think about the future or the past. When you meditate you have no choice but to see your best life now because you are focused only on this moment. If the past and the future cease to exist while you are in the present, then this is your best life. Use what you see and feel during your meditation to your best advantage.

Enjoy the Journey

Above all, don’t forget to enjoy the journey. Ralph Waldo Emerson once said, “Life is a journey, not a destination.” Another saying I’ve always been kind of partial to is “Life is what happens when you’re making other plans” (John Lennon).

It doesn’t have to be that way. Plans are good. Goals are good. But living your best life each moment of each day is even better. Because we don’t know which day will be our last, today really is a gift. Accept the gift and live it the best way you know how today.

10 Quotes on Motivation

Stephen Covey Motivation QuoteStick around long enough and you’ll see just how much I love quotations. Many times, it’s that one little line spoken or written by someone else that give me the ah ha! moment that I need to put everything into perspective. And for me, staying motivated would be pretty much impossible without these reminders. So here are ten of my favorite quotes on motivation and being motivated. Enjoy!

  • Motivation is what gets you started. Habit is what keeps you going. ~Jim Rohn
  • “Be miserable. Or motivate yourself. Whatever has to be done, it’s always your choice.” ~Wayne Dyer
  • “Walking your talk is a great way to motivate yourself. No one likes to live a lie. Be honest with yourself, and you will find the motivation to do what you advise others to do.” ~Vince Poscente
  • “You can motivate by fear. And you can motivate by reward. But both of these methods are only temporary. The only lasting thing is self-motivation.” ~Homer Rice
  • “Desire is the key to motivation, but it’s determination and commitment to an unrelenting pursuit of your goal – a commitment to excellence – that will enable you to attain the success you seek.” ~Mario Andretti
  • “Wanting something is not enough. You must hunger for it. Your motivation must be absolutely compelling in order to overcome the obstacles that will invariably come your way.” ~Les Brown
  • “Motivation is like food for the brain. You cannot get enough in one sitting. It needs continual and regular top ups.” ~Peter Davies
  • “Motivation is when your dreams put on work clothes.” ~Author Unknown
  • “Life takes on meaning when you become motivated, set goals and charge after them in an unstoppable manner.” ~Les Brown
  • “When we are motivated by goals that have deep meaning, by dreams that need completion, by pure love that needs expressing, then we truly live life” ~Greg Anderson
  • Have a wonderful, motivation-filled day!

    10 Quotes To Inspire You

    Stick around here long enough and you’ll find out just how much I love quotes. They pretty much run neck and neck with affirmations as my favorite tools for motivation and inspiration. So to start the weekend off right, here are ten of my favorite inspiring quotes.

    Enjoy!
    lena

    • Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn’t do than by the ones that you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover. – Mark Twain
    • Well done is better than well said. – Benjamin Franklin
    • Only those who will risk going too far can possibly find out how far one can go. – T.S. Elliot
    • Take the first step in faith. You don’t have to see the whole staircase, just take the first step. – Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.
    • All that we are is the result of what we have thought. – Buddha
    • People often say that motivation doesn’t last. Well, neither does bathing – that’s why we recommend it daily. – Zig Ziglar
    • Begin with the ending in mind. – Stephen Covey
    • If you don’t go after what you want, you’ll never have it. If you don’t ask, the answer is always no. If you don’t step forward, you’re always in the same place. – Nora Roberts
    • Experience is not what happens to a man, it is what a man does with what happens to him. – Aldous Leonard Huxley
    • Don’t go where the path may lead, go instead where there is no path and leave a trail. – Ralph Waldo Emerson

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