Five Baby Steps For Growing Self-Confidence Even When You’re Shaking in Your Shoes

6b81a7febf778cc9bdff1e74f3f5c957
Buffer

5 ways to build your self confidenceIs there anyone who wouldn’t like to be more self-confident? It’s definitely one of the things I struggle with on a daily basis is being more self-confident. Whether it’s from having buck teeth when I was little, or being the youngest in my class all the way through school, or a by-product of being abused in two marriages (slow-learner?) I’m not sure. Most likely it’s a combination of all of it, and that’s okay because it means that every day is a new challenge not to let my insecurities get the better of me. It’s one reason why I try to write something and post it every day, even when I’m sure it’s not very good. And the funny thing about that … it’s usually the articles I think are really bad that get the most comments and seem to help others the most. Funny how that works.

But, you’re not here to listen to me whine. And so instead of whining about how little self-confidence I have most days, I have for you a few of the tips I use to make it look like I’m the most confident person in the world, even when I’m shaking in my boots.

1. Develop an “attitude of gratitude.”

Being grateful creates a sense of peace within that in turn creates confidence.

I start every day by writing down five things I’m grateful for. By doing this I find that that the day starts with a completely different energy than if I had got out of bed and started grumbling about what I don’t have or what I have to do today. Try it, and let me know how it works for you.

2. Dress for success.

Sounds trite, I know. But I’m sure it’s equally as trite (and also as true) that when you look good, you feel good. If you dress to look your best, you’ll feel better and this will translate into more self-confidence. Even if your wardrobe is full of jeans and t-shirts like mine, choosing your best fitting jeans and your nicest t-shirt will make you feel better than if you dress in baggy sweats, even if no one sees them but you.

3. When in a group setting, sit near the front.

I never thought much about this when I was in school, but people with self-confidence issues tend to hide out in the back of the room and hope no one notices them. You can, and will, instantly appear more confident just by choosing to sit near the front of the room.

4. Walk faster. And keep your head up!

People who walk at a brisk pace appear more confident because they look like they know where they’re going. Even if you’re not sure where you’re headed, walking faster and holding your head up will help you feel more confident while you figure it out.

5. Get regular exercise.

You knew I was going to get that in here somehow, didn’t you? There’s nothing that exudes self-confidence like a well-toned body. People who are fit not only look healthy, they also have more energy. And they radiate a better, more healthy energy than people who are out of shape and overweight.

I can tell you from my own experience that even though I’ve only lost about 30 pounds so far, I feel so much better and more confident. Even though I have a long way to go, every little bit helps.

Good health and energy along with the compliments they bring are great self-confidence boosters. And I am grateful for every single one of those compliments when they come my way.

Now, lest you think I’m being flippant and taking the subject of self-confidence lightly… I’m not. I have worked every day of my life to get what little self-confidence I have, and I will keep working at it a little each day. It’s not something that happens overnight… I wish… but by using the tips that resonate with you, it is possible to take a lifetime of hiding in the background and turn it around. If I can do it, I know you can do it even better!

6b81a7febf778cc9bdff1e74f3f5c957
Buffer
  • http://carolynhughesthehurthealer.wordpress.com/ Carolyn Hughes

    I love these tips because they are all do-able! I like your idea of dress for success. When I’m having a challenging time I always make sure that I make an effort with how I dress and what make up I’m wearing. Sometimes a bit of ‘fake it to make it’ is the only way!

  • http://www.facebook.com/SteveGamlin Steve Gamlin

    Wow, what a great list! I had it all until 7th grade, then began the slide (changed schools, away from all my friends). Started getting it back about 8 years ago. I can see how the last few years have really helped me get back in the game, especially due to #2 and #4. : )

  • http://www.sherievenner.com Sherie Venner

    I was the youngest in my class, too, all the way through from grade three and through university, so I hear you on that one! Great tips and insights for looking confident even when you don’t feel like it. When you act as if, you can turn it around.

  • http://www.WellnessWithMoira.com/ Moira Hutchison

    These are all excellent tips! I’ve worked hard over the years to gain the self confidence I now have… my favorite recipe for success in this area is a combination of your tips #2 , #4 & #5 – thanks for being an excellent source of inspiration!

  • Lisa Birnesser

    Great tips, Lena. I loved the first one for sure. Gratitude is so very important. “Being grateful creates a sense of peace within that in turn creates confidence.” And this is so very true. When you are grateful you are in the present moment. Otherwise you could be worrying about the past or fretting the future. Staying present gets you in touch with your inner power. Thanks!

  • http://anitafiander.com/ Anita Fiander

    I am on track with your advice except #5…I am slack in this area. I need to commit and stick to it..Getting better though :)

  • http://www.facebook.com/ElizabethLManess Liz Maness

    Aww heck, I really need to start walking again! it’s so good for me body and mind!..